Lexington, MA

Thursday, February 15, 2007

No Trust, No Lust:

Children of Domestic Violence May Grow Up to Hate Sex, Says Expert

Press Release Source: Aline P. Zoldbrod, Ph.D.

According to statistics, a woman is beaten every 15 seconds. The Center for Disease Control estimates that domestic violence affects 1 in 3 American families. More than 32 million people, mostly women, are affected each year, resulting in 2 million reported injuries and approximately 1,300 deaths. But there is another surprising and terrible legacy suffered by the boys and girls who watched the carnage when they grow up: sexual dysfunction. The sexual problems of adults who grew up witnessing family violence are profound -- and they constitute a secret and misunderstood epidemic. Both men and women who witnessed aggression as children are affected.

"Most people -- patients and mental health professionals alike -- assume that the major cause of deep seated sexual problems is always sexual abuse, but this is incorrect," says Aline Zoldbrod, Ph.D., a Boston-based sex therapist and author. "Women who come from families where they watched their mothers being slammed around the kitchen like rag dolls have equally as weighty sexual problems as the victims of sexual abuse I have treated" Common female sexual dysfunctions found in women who witnessed their mothers being abused are arousal disorders, desire disorders and pain disorders.

Zoldbrod's interpersonal theory of sexual development looks at different developmental milestones which need to be achieved in order for a person to be able to have both emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy with the same person. Critical milestones include good experiences with touch, trust, power and gender roles. "Witnessing family violence causes deep distrust of others, changed body boundaries and altered reactions to touch, and difficulty with power and gender roles," according to psychologist Zoldbrod.

Experts in the effect of violence on family members point out that slaps or beatings do not have to occur often for psychogical damage to result. Once a few intense beatings are administered, it can take not much more than a threatening glance or a slammed door periodically to recreate a continuing sense of threat. Patients don't realize this. They may minimize what happened by remarking: "Really, it only happened a few times"

It is painful for people to think of themselves as victims. So many adults who witnessed violence in their family of origin normalize it. They will make statements like, "That's just what it was like in my neighborhood. All the parents fought"

"Family violence is nothing new, unfortunately, but its damage runs deeper than

most of us fathom," says AASECT-certified sex therapist Aline Zoldbrod, Ph.D of www.SexSmart.com. According to Zoldbrod, when adult victims of family violence learn to make the connection between their childhood experiences and their sexual fears and inhibitions, change is possible.

Zoldbrod is a Boston-based psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist, a sexual expert on IVillage's Mismatched Libidos chat board, and the author of the award winning book, "Sex Smart: How Your Childhood Shaped Your Sexual Life and What to Do About It"

Contact her for more details:

Aline Zoldbrod, Ph.D.

www.SexSmart.com

phone 781-863-1877

fax 781-860-0982

12 Rumford Road

Lexington, Massachusetts 02420

Aline Zoldbrod Ph.D.

AASECT certified sex therapist, licensed psychologist

Lexington, MA

781-863-1877